This past week I played hostess to a team of broadcast and communications guys from headquarters. Before they arrived, I was really unsure of all it would entail. I started to figure it out pretty quickly. On Friday of the previous week, they hit the ground running and I took off running with them. My goal was for their time here to be as productive as possible. This is the time for them to be able to see and show others what is going on here in the Philippines. In my head, it just felt like the pressure was on to direct them to the right places and the right people.
By the time Monday came, I had already seen so many plans made and remade. I was feeling stressed and overwhelmed as things fell through and shifted and completely changed directions. To me, it felt like failure, and it doesn't take much getting to know me to learn how I feel about failure. In short, I don't like it.
Thankfully, I was sent a great encourager in one of the communications guys. He kept reminding me that God will work things out how he wants them, and that doesn't necessarily mean how things were planned. This can be a difficult lesson for me. I feel like with each year that passes, I become more and more of a planner. What I was after was success, and I didn't feel like I was being successful. Isn't that how God works a lot of times though? When we want to be successful, and prove how great we are, God allows things to change a bit. It has to do with trust and humility.
Why is it that over and over again we have to learn trust and humility? We must learn that things are not always in our control.
I like control, but this week I was reminded that actually, it's way better that things are not always in my hands, but in bigger, much more capable hands. For that, I am thankful.
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